[x]

Does that make me Different?I wear make up. Does that make me fake?
I cry. Does that make me emo?
I have male friends. Does that make me slutty?
I smile a lot. Does that make me weird?
I laugh loud. Does that make me preppy?
I have anxiety. Does that make me a freak?
I have Bipolar Disorder. Does that make me abnormal?
I respect people. I change for me, and only me. I have a past, but I know I have a future.
Does that make me different?
Maybe.
But at least it makes me
Me.

FrostbiteNumbness
I can’t feel my toes and at first I think
It’s just my toes.
I can cover them up.
I can warm them.

It spreads, like fire,
Like ice.
I glance away for a second, it seems, and my feet are cold
Pat –pat
That’s funny, I didn’t feel that
Maybe I’ll cover them up too
I’ll warm them up.

I’ll take a nap
Maybe a short rest will make it all better, warm them
Up…
What’s that? How long has it been?
My legs… are you still mine..
Why has my breath left me, short?
Has everything but deserted me?

What about you, are you still here?
Are you still with me?
Hello?
And before I can say goodbye, I think my thoughts are leaving me too –

Sleeping Beautyshe’s in love with a character who
never existed but in the labyrinth of her head:
a patchwork composition of beautiful, lengthy words
she’d heard in her catatonic state; coma living
day in and day out, reliant on the salvation
of a man made of foreign wishing
and imperfection and necessity – an ignorance
of the less than ideal perception of self she’d
come to fear, absention stained romantic to the point
where daydreams were a standard for survival

(real living is for the purposeful of heart,
he loves her in her sleep)

UneditedWe cry.
We scream.
We fight for our dream.

We scream.
We cry.
We're just waiting to die.

The same emotions
with a different drive.
Sometimes dead, sometimes alive.

The same in one way,
different in another
brother and sister, sister and brother.

So close in feeling,
so different in the end.
Falling apart, or finally on the mend?

Which am I?
Will I ever know?
Fighting to stay or ready to go?

Maybe I'm both,
in some impossible way.
Emotions oddly mixed everyday.

Wouldn't surprise.
I'm such a freak.
Excuse me, I laugh, I should call it "unique"

Happily AloneHonesty,
She does not have,
Personalities,
She has many of them.

A million shields,
a million personalities,
She's always changing,
to fit every person around her.

If one were to ask why,
she would answer with,
I will never reveal my weaknesses,
because she's evil.

She hates everyone,
stupider than her is barely tolerable,
smarter than her is too scary,
She hates it all.

She leaves the world behind,
To one she has dreamt of,
No color,
nobody else.

Then,
she will smile,
why,
because she is truly happy alone.

She is not evil,
She does not hate you,
She is not dishonest,
She simply wants to be alone.

lifelinesI fear the sound of sparrows
and the density of leaves
against dew-muffled blades
of grass,

and I'm drowning
in the sky.

My skin has learned how
to peel itself off
without causing a commotion
in my marrows or
even show the slightest hint
of pain,
and my heart has learned how
to hush the stars in their wake
and keep it all a secret.

There's a sea in my mouth
and I can't swim.

There are lifelines
cast like these and it will
all end with the same tragedy.

We are the King and Queen of Broken DreamsStanding still in a mine field, staring at all we have left.
We were so young, we didn’t stop to think.
Now we’re in a car crash, teetering on the brink.
If you were to leave me now, I don’t know what I’d do.

It was a whirl wind romance,
A light when all was black, a spark of something when all was bleak.
You swept me off my feet and made me feel brand new.
I thought we could live forever and I’m certain you did to.

We built a house without foundations
And now we’re falling down,
Everything’s crumbling around us, time slipping through out fingertips.
People used to walk past us but they were to drunk to see,
That our lives are coming apart around us, there is no light as far as we can see.

There was no fire to start with,
Just two broken things, the world had left behind.
The casualties of other people’s dreams of power, money and control,
Spat out onto the curb to rot away and die.
We never stood a chance or so

of seafoam thronesFrom Atlas’ hands she wept to me,
atop Africas and South Atlantics;

this is one situation unaffected by
ember eyes and windy lashes
(it has no anatomy).

You are sparrows stranded
in tiny crevices and cliffside love,
though you rebuke flight
in the fear of chipping feathers.

So what do you do?

You reach for my soul,
coveting flight with shaking
dainty arms…

and perhaps I’ll let you:
With flytrap lips and
glass shaped hips…
you are unfit for anything but
sight.

(But beauty isn’t everything)

Falling off the EdgeDo you know what it feels like?
To nearly fall off the edge,
but not quite...
just so that you're dangling;
clinging for your worthless life
lest it fall into the sea of loneliness.
Your callused, pink fingers turning
to a shade of purplish-red of pain
as it does it best to hold on.

Splash.

In the sea of loneliness,
everything is crisp, translucent.
There is nothing around you,
you are alone...
unlike other people,
you have no one
clamouring to save you;
you have no one
diving in to get you out.

There is no point
screaming for help,
you will only waste
the little time and air you have left.
You only have the darkness
of the sea envelop

PerfectEver had the feeling where you can't stop looking at a picture?
Your gorgeous face makes me smile
Go weak at the knees
Makes me giggle like a little girl

Those morning texts
All day conversations
Random silly things like that
Make me smile

I see the led light flash the colours I've set for when I get a message from you
My heart flutters
My cheeks flush
I go deaf to the world when I'm reading a message from you

If your down
I'm always there for you
I know you don't want to worry me
I know you want me to smile
But I'm always here for you
No matter how you feel
I'd prefer to help
Than for you to be down

Your gorgeous eyes
Are mesmerising
You

weight of the worldand suddenly--
it was like the world decided that
it didn't want to carry its burden any longer,
so it shifted the weight
into the hollows of my bones
and told me that
it was my problem now.

Ashes on the SandWe put you in
a crystal box
small enough for me
to hold in my
hands
(and that thought gives me
chill bumps)
The tide was high
where we took you
and I remember thinking
how pointless it was
(you were just going to wash
up on the shore)
Everyone was quiet
and some people cried
and as you were tossed
out to sea like so
many grains of sand
I thought how much
I missed you
(Now I think how much
I hate you
for leaving)

Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,
but what can you say?
Nothing can help her.
The pain won't go away.

But she would've stopped,
you could've said no.
That's what she wanted,
someone to say don't go.

That someone wanted her,
or at least would try.
That someone would grieve
if she were to die.

But you just stared,
nodding your head,
and she realized the truth
with a feeling of dread.

No one wanted her.
No one cared.
Not even you,
with the the love you shared.

So she said good-bye,
and you watched her leave.
She may have had the rope,
but now you can't breathe.

A Charmed LifeDoll-faced men and sinkholes, ancient tombstones
Leaves piled ankle-deep, falling down
Old wells, old graves, old friends lost
Pirate adventures in Neverland
Don't go into that barn

Ponchoboy and Rangergirl rise from the ashes
From the cold river, from afar
Remember before they were born, how they
Held hands and jumped into the world
Don't go into that school

Ladybugs, pennies, notes from the dead sun eclipse
Scrape the inside of your skull for clues
All the old dreams are still there, petrified
You are a rock of ages gibbering
Don't go into that factory

Why don't you kill yourself?“Why don’t you kill yourself?”
Is the voice that often pops in my head
To remind me I’d be better off dead.
As I sit in my two story house
I’m always alone and filled with doubt.
I take medications I don’t know why
These thoughts constantly go through my mind.
I remind myself I have friends who care
And my parents, well, try to be there.
Some would think I’m being over dramatic
Others will think these thoughts could only come from an addict
Or a psycho.
As I weigh the pros and cons
The commercials shut off, the main program goes on
So I turn my mind off and let the show play
And hope that I can be happy one day.

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I Think I'm Done.I'm the girl with broken dreams,
the girl with a broken soul,
the girl with a broken heart,
and I can never be fixed.
You can try and try again,
but I'll always be this way.
There's no going back now.
I can't stop this blackness.
I can't control my inner demons.
I'm so tired;
I'm so weak.
I'm so done.
I'll be gone soon,
and you'll forget me;
my memories will wither away,
and you'll quickly move on.

Your Love.Your love has me all tied up in knots,
all mixed around.
I don't know which way's up
or which way's down.
Baby, your love's my addiction,
I'm on clouds when I'm with you.
Can you tell me how you feel?
Are you feeling this too?

My Comfort.There is no end in sight,
and nothing will ever be all right.
All I see is this darkness that has swallowed me whole;
it has completely consumed my soul.
I'm not sure how to end this,
but I think I'll just wallow and dismiss.

Vicodin.Oh, Vicodin.
You're my best friend.
Make me high;
Make me numb.
Make me dumb.
Make me forget
the pain,
the hurt.
Make me happy.

The Struggles Of Her Life. She's alone standing in the middle of her room, unsure of what to do next. She's never done anything like what she has just done, and she's a little confused about why she just did it. All that she knows is that she liked the feeling; it had given her relief of all of the emotions that have been bottled up for years. She saw the blood start to create beads, and she wasn't sure of what to do. She grabbed a tissue and pressed it against the swollen, bleeding wound. She put her weapon down, an uncoiled paperclip, and starts to search for a Band-Aid to cover it up. She finds one and carefully places it over the cut, and pulls on some sweats.
Remembering that she is in class, she snaps back to reality. She can't seem to stop thinking about that first time. She had thought that it would stop there with that first one, but it had only snow-balled into much worse. Now, she couldn't even wear short sleeves or shorts because

I'm Going To.I'm going to shout it from the rooftops, baby.
I'm going to declare you as mine.
I'm going to tell everyone how much I love you
and tell them that we're going to be together forever.
I'm going to kiss you in front of them all
and maybe they'll stare, but we won't care.
I'm going to show you how beautiful you really are;
I'm going to treat you like a queen.
I'm going to treat you right, baby,
and I promise I'll love you forever.
I'm going to show you how much I love you every day
and kiss you every chance I get.
I'm going to show you off to the world.
I'm going to be yours forever.

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Submitted: April 5, 2012
Submitted with: Sta.sh Writer

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Life, Or Perhaps Death.

by *ThatOneArtistGirl, Apr 5, 2012, 7:30:44 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

There's no end in sight,

how much longer

can I bear this weight?

I'm being crushed

by the second.

Living each day

is so tiring,

so worthless.

Where's the escape?

I just want out,

I want to be done.

I'm so tired...

I can sleep for the night,

and I'm still tired.

I want to sleep

for eternity.

Life, Or Perhaps Death.by *ThatOneArtistGirl

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

~CupcakeRemix Apr 7, 2012 Hobbyist

know the feeling :/ well written :3
However, lately I just wanted to get really drunk instead of dying... don't know if it is a good or a bad thing...

*ThatOneArtistGirl Apr 7, 2012 Student General Artist

I'm sorry /: And thanks. c:
That's not good.. well. I guess it's better than wanting to die, but still not good.

~CupcakeRemix Apr 7, 2012 Hobbyist

You're welcome :3
Yeah I guess the best would be to actually like life as it is? Right now I am happy~
But a week ago, I was not! A few days ago, I was not! But hey, I might still be happy tomorrow?
I still wanna get drunk though... but now I feel it more like in a partying way that to lie in a corner somewhere and throw up ^^'

*ThatOneArtistGirl Apr 7, 2012 Student General Artist

Well, you know you can always note me

~CupcakeRemix Apr 7, 2012 Hobbyist

Yeah I know

~LoneOokami Apr 6, 2012 Student Photographer

I. Love. You.

I'm here for you Hun :/ I'll note you now

*ThatOneArtistGirl Apr 6, 2012 Student General Artist

Love you toooo.

~LoneOokami Apr 7, 2012 Student Photographer

:3 <3

!spiegoli Apr 5, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

NO!!!!!!!!!

*ThatOneArtistGirl Apr 5, 2012 Student General Artist

Why? It's so much easier..

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Life, Or Perhaps Death.

Life, Or Perhaps Death.by *ThatOneArtistGirl

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